Thursday, December 27, 2007

Hitting The Reset Button On My Life!

Yesterday was amazing!

Since restarting this life of mine I have encountered so many wonderful things!
I started off the day meeting one of the most interesting people in Caledon: Lady Ordinal Malaprop!

She invents guns and firearms as well as other sophisticated items. And to coin an overused phrase: is quite a bit ahead of her time. We had an interesting conversation at her shop.

[11:49] You: I once got the notion to use a series of magnets to "pull" a bullet through a series of rails, so that the final speed of the round could exceed that of an ordinary shell. Also it would make the gun quieter as the only sound it would make would be that of the sonic barrier being breached.
[11:49] You: But I dismissed the idea as absolutely silly.
[11:49] You: I mean really. Magnets?
[11:50] Ordinal Malaprop: Rather weak things all told, unless there is some sort of rare earth that one could use.
[11:50] Ordinal Malaprop: And then the whole thing would collapse.
[11:51] You: Yes and considering my construction, I'm afraid I would get large sections of the gun jammed into my body in a very uncomfortable and perhaps comical manner.
[11:51] Ordinal Malaprop: Mind you, well, I do have my balloon platform, but that is not what one would call strictly magnetic force, or else the entire building would collapse.
[11:51] Qlippothic Projects nods
[11:51] Ordinal Malaprop: And also not very fast.
[11:52] You: Actually I tend to not enjoy magnets as a rule. For some reason I can never remember what I was doing with the magnets. Its like parts of my memory are totally erased by them.
[11:52] Ordinal Malaprop: How peculiar! I can't imagine why that might be.
[11:52] Qlippothic Projects shrugs
[11:52] You: I did try to start a magnet collection once but I cant recall where I left it.

Later in the day I along with a few other amateur detectives were asked to solve a fictional murder that had occurred in Caledon. the clues were very difficult to find and even with my superior senses it was difficult to find them all.

In the end I was down to two weapons and two suspects, and my battery charge was dangerously low. So I reported my deductions to Lady Darkling and hoped I would be correct.


Though a reward was offered, I think the idea of the bragging rights and sense of accomplishment was even better. Retiring to my recharging area atop the house I slept a short time.

When I awoke later I met up with father again, and we proceeded to Mr. Hotspur O'Toole's Birthday party. It was a very wild and festive occasion where we celebrated by dancing and engaging in something called Amish Rake Fighting.

I also met a couple of very special friends from my past. Captain Bohemia, and Mr. Hassanov, were there to dance with me, as was Neome!

I felt a little strange because these people were all very special to Qli, and I felt worried they would be disappointed with me. Afterall, I do not have Qli's memories and I can never be the Qli they knew and loved. But, I found them to be very accepting and lovely.

I look forward to my further adventures in this strange new land and body.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

New Beginnings And Old Friends

It has been a few days since my conciousness transferred itself to the soul-chip of my friend Qli. Our bodies seem to have partially merged, with some backwards and forwards modification in technology present.

However, of the two of us it seems only my conciousness survived. True some things from Qli are still within me, I consider Dr. Mason to be Father because even humans refer to their creator as Father. But certain relationships and former friendships are not present within my memory.

In rebuilding my life, I have also modified the chassis in which I now reside, using elements of the strange aetherwork technology, and my own advanced microsystems. This has resulted in some alteration in my appearance, and dress.

Father has begun introducing me as Qli 2.0, which I think is very cute. Qli had many friends, many I do not know. I will endeavor to get to know them all. Though I can never be the Qlippothic they knew and loved, I am eager to be worthy of their friendship.

Speaking of new beginnings, Father and I visited Steelhead Harbor last night. It is a raw, unspoiled landscape, ripe for creation. I am eager to see the uses it is put to.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Rescue Gone Awry (a change of cast)

Some paradigms shifts are subtle, like Steelhead transforming from the Wierd Wild West into Gaslamp Fantasy. But when the city of Hostel was catapulted overnight from the 19th century into the 21st, there was chaos.

Buildings erupted from the ground. Circuitry ripped asunder the cobblestone streets like the roots of alien weeds. Lycans that normally knew know fear raced in terror through the maze of streets that writhed like serpents shedding scales of rock for polymer. Vampires fell out of their ejected coffins as graveyards spat out their tenants, stone memorials tossing about like massive dice on giant's casino table. Feral cats yowled in terror as millenia of evolution occured in the course of an hour, growing them into full-sized, very irate nekos. Humans wandered about dazed from the shock of Reality melding metal and microprocessors to flesh.

Qlippothic appeared in the mist of this chaos in an explosion of lightning, her brass and gears shining in a realm where her definition was changing from innvative to obselete in the tick of melting timepiece.

"Nova! Nova Sakigake!"

She grabbed her artificial companion's hand.

"You are not safe here! You will be safe at the Bloodwing Foundation!"

Qli initiated the dimensional escape just as a tidalwave of circuitry inundated them both. They held each other's wrists tightly as they catapulted through the void of Absolute Elsewhere. Their features and attachments changed to orbs and floated around them.

"Our construct integrities are compromised!" Qli shouted, her voice distorted in the Paradox around them. "Redoubling Probability Shield Strength!"

The gynoids were pulled closer together by their strengthened bubble of gravity. Unidentifiable components still floated away in a trail behind them through the chronosphere. Brass, steel, chrome and silicon intermingled like melting wax.

"Temporal beacon located", the two voices said as one. "Critical loss of matter: fifty-six percent. We will not survive the transisiton back to reality!"

Qlippothic's voice spoke after an unmeasurable silence. "Reconfiguration will occur automatically, expect amalgamation into a single construct. It is our only chance."

"The only other option is total annihlation...proceed with amalgamation."

There was a flash of galvanic energy, and a familiar figure of brass stood in the den of the Bloodwing Foundation. Coal-red eyes scanned the envoronment.

"Qlippothic?" She asked in a voice more British than the American dialect she was taught. "Unable to locate...Location confirmed. Zero metres from present location...ERROR! ERROR! Qlippothic? Do you read? Qlippothic???"

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

PR Imperfect!

Baron Wulfenbach just passed me this news clipping from Prim Perfect magazine, and I nearly choked on my chrome cakes!

Theodore Crates, Chief of the Caledon Volunteer Fire Brigade, points out that he's a steampunk android - so it should be obvious!

Either someone is involved in sloppy journalism or there is an impostor on the loose! When I finish rechanging this evening I must get to the bottom of this!

Father! Help me get back in my humanoid form! And where is my axe??

~Captain Q. Projects, CVFB

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Miracle on Polymath Street

[20:54] Santa: Erm, Hello, little... thing?
[20:54] Santa: is it even possible for you to sit in this guise?
[20:55] Santa Ho Ho Hos warily...
[20:55] Qlippothic Projects: I suppose you know what I am going to ask.
[20:55] Santa: GOMPH!!!!
[20:55] Santa: you're a tad.. heavier than my usual...
[20:55] Santa feels his knees compress
[20:56] Qlippothic Projects: That is exactly the problem, Mr. Claus. Or is it Nicholas?
[20:56] Santa gasps.. contrary to popular belief.. I'm not omniscient.
[20:56] Santa: I just.. .have.... a very good ... surveillance department.
[20:57] Santa: mind shifting to the other knee before it crushes? Oh, thank you.
[20:57] Qlippothic Projects: Well, I would like to be changed back into my humanoid form
[20:57] Santa: As a Christmas present?
[20:57] Qlippothic Projects: If that is what it takes
[20:57] Santa: You realize that this might be a bit outside the purview of North Pole Limited, er.. Miss?
[20:58] Qlippothic Projects: You do make robotic toys?
[20:58] Qlippothic Projects: even a tiny one would be better than this
[20:58] Santa: we normally deal in the odd toy doll, toy gun, clockwork...
[20:58] Santa: Robots??? Robots! why yes, we DO make toy robots...
[20:59] Santa: We have an entire prison camp.. er.. FACTORY jobbing out that task right now.
[20:59] Santa: Great people, the Chinese... almost as industrious as Elves.. and mostly Atheists.. imagine having to make an evening's delivery for one billion households.. Oy!
[20:59] Qlippothic Projects: Do you have a model available on site?
[21:00] Santa rubs hands gleefully.. or would.. were they not balancing a several hundred pound steambot on his person.
[21:00] Qlippothic Projects 's robotic tentacle searches Santa's sack.
[21:00] Santa: At best, we could let you see a prototype..
[21:00] Qlippothic Projects: Ah, this one is perfect
[21:00] Santa: but.. we've never tested this..
[21:00] Santa: it really is outside our line of work, Miss!
[21:00] Santa: PHEW! Thank you for shifting..
[21:01] Qlippothic Projects: Father never tested THIS either!
[21:01] Santa: Now now, be respectful to your father, that's a good little killbot.
[21:01] Qlippothic Projects extracts her soul chip and inserts it in the memory slot of the toy
[21:01] Santa: My my! What a transformation!

The spider-mech transformed into a rather large menorah when it was deactivated. The only thing I forgot to ask is if this form was made with lead paint...

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Steelpunk at Steamhead

In an effort to invite more Neo-Victorians to settle in Steelhead Harborside, we threw a Steampunk-themed party last night.

I greeted guests at the door, and made sure they were dressed appropriately. Mr. Hassanov was on the guest list, but the hat had to go.

This one claims she knows Dr. Steel. I let her in.

On the Tiny List.

Everybody conga? Oh wait, it's polonaise. Isn't that what people spread on theri sandwiches in Warsaw?

In the middle of the festivities, I was summoned back to Father's lab. He gleefully tells me he has a Hanukkah present for me. I gratefully said I'd accept it. I woke up like this.

Father...I know the Spark makes you build strange things but...a spider mech?

To make matters worse, I was overcome by a hunting instinct and chased Tensai about the square.

Afterwards I visited Miss Orr to get some advice on how to deal with this new form. Her beign a shapeshifter, I've seen her powers go awry more than once. I did find I had the power to cling to the underside of skyboxes. Good I guess for when large robotic flies decide to buzz through.

Perhaps some meditation calm me enough to figure out what to do next.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Keeping the Seas Safe!

Behold the CVFB's new water vehicle, the HMS Alison Alena! (Named after a scripter who helped him design the vehicle.)

Guardian daemon and fellow Firefighter Icterus Dagger has equipped this vessel with turbine engines, a concept fully a hundred years ahead of its time! You had best hang on tightly!

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Tagged by the Moon Elf

Very well..

1. When Flea Bussy built my engine, the coal chute was labelled a "chest hatch". For obvious reasons, I reconfigured it to go on my abdomen. She also built some...faucets.

2. When I founded the Caledon Volounteer Fire Department, I was trying hard to be Caledonian, a bit too hard in fact. Now I stick to writing in New World English.

3. I only worked in Le Jardin et Lumiere once, and that was as a bartender.

4. The first ball I went to in Steelhead was an outside event. The sploder was dispersing Linden dollars, and I thought it was malfunctioning. I offered to repair it, and I was dissuaded.

5. When Steelhead played Big Band music at their Formal events, people dedicated the song Steam Heat to me. I also became obsessed with finding the one they called "Nat, King of Coal".

6. I like to be addressed as Captain Projects, Qlippothic, or even Qli. I do not like being called Qlip, and especially don't like being called Qlippo!

7. I enjoy playing En Garde! Even though my technique is in dire need of improvement.

8. You will never find me in Gorean silks!

I would call out eight people, but judging by the exponential rate of this silliness, all the friends I have who write blogs have probably answered theirs already.